Twitter’s Pearls of the Day for November 21, 2023

Ah, such an autumnal Tuesday is so beautiful! It’s finally raining heavily and the wind turns our umbrella into a sail. And then there are the wonderfully grumpy people, with the horribly droopy corners of their mouths, who walk glumly to work! Isn’t it wonderful and wonderful? No, we don’t think so either! At least the miserable autumn will be over soon and we can fill the void caused by winter with Christmas cookies! To give you some hope and love, we went on a journey for you and brought delightful tweets with us. Today you can laugh with us about cats who saw more than they wanted and we will also clarify when it is best to stop eating toast. So dig deeper into your hole in the ground or get comfy on the couch, because here are the Twitter gems of the day for you!

#1: Who doesn’t know the pizza kebab diet

I just realized that last week I canceled a Sunday drinking date with a friend because I wanted to live a healthier lifestyle at the moment. So yesterday I just posted my DÖNERPIZZA in bold everywhere on the internet 😀
Well shit went wrong

– Donnie O’Sullivan (@DonnieOsullivan) November 20, 2023

#2: Does he have a very clean secret second home?

The man says he vacuumed the apartment.
Now I just need to find out which apartment he’s referring to.

— JanaínaDJRainerChantal 🇫🇷🇧🇷🇦🇹 (@19janaina04) November 20, 2023

#3: Do we really want to hear the story about this?

I have doubts…

— ｍａｎｓｈａｄｏｗ 📯 (@manshadow74) November 20, 2023

#4: Luckily we don’t understand the kitten!

It’s funny how the cat relaxes watching me masturbate 😂

-Nina (@gluehkaeferchen) November 20, 2023

#5: Program for everyone (over 70)

In today’s prime time on rbb, first the big gingerbread test, then a repeat of Tatort from 1988. At 25, I’m happy to pay fees for my local station.

– julius geiler (@glr_berlin) November 20, 2023

#6: What would you do?

Is it enough to throw away this slice and can I still eat the rest or have the logo spores already spread across the bread?

-Eilena Schi (@dieallerleute) November 20, 2023

#7: How homemade

I just got a screen protector on my phone for the first time in my life without a single bubble.

From now on I’m going to let the teenager do it.

—müdchen (@dafaelltmirein) November 20, 2023

#8: We are hungry now

Children should no longer say “delicious corpse puree soup” to Bolognese sauce at school, and what kind of conversations do you have with teachers?

(8y: “But why don’t they want that, I specifically said ‘yummy’!” 🙄😂)

– Mrs. G. de B. (@FrauGausB) November 20, 2023

#9: What a rag!

The child (8) must wash. Put cloths on.

👧: I didn’t want the black towel, I got the blue one.

The blue:

-Phil (@de_la_who) November 19, 2023

#10: In love, in love, married!

Today a male and female patient, both single, had an intense conversation in the waiting room and were sad that they were unable to continue the conversation.

To be a good consultation assistant, I scheduled their next appointment on the same day.

Cupid does the rest.

-Skadi (@skadi2102) November 20, 2023

Are you still alive or are you already serving?